I came across an article today that shed light on a concerning issue: society’s tendency to forget about our elders, who are increasingly feeling the impact of this neglect. It got me thinking about the future and how our lives might look when we reach the age of 80. Have you considered what your life might be like at that stage? Do you believe that our children should take on the responsibility of caring for us in our old age? And perhaps more importantly, do you think they will? Let’s talk about it..
Leon Gaytan: “I asked my daughter and she told me, ‘it depends on what I’m doing in my life, maybe I will be rich and famous and I can hire you a personal nanny…’I told her as long as she can find my teeth so I can eat my prunes… lol.”
Sandra Luna Perez: “I was always there for my parents. When my mom passed, I retired to live with my dad for 3 years until he passed. I believe that we have to set examples. I don’t want to be a burden to my daughters but I do believe they will be there for me as I get older and can’t be on my own. They were there when I was going through my cancer and never left my side. You lead by example.”
Michelle Rushing: “I know my kids would! They already help me with my mom who has Alzheimers. My oldest takes on most of the care! Would be up a creek without him!”
Annabelle Perez Martinez: “Do I think they will or should? It’s not up to me to decide. I hope that they will. I brought my parents to live with us at the start of COVID. During this timeframe, they both became terminally ill. It was extremely difficult to see my strong independent parents’ health decline. But if you were to ask me now, knowing what I know now, if I’d do it again, my answer would be absolutely YES without a doubt. I’d do it all over again. My children were blessed to be able to hear about their childhood memories, during their final years. Something I am certain would not have occurred had they not moved in. I would hope the exposure my children experienced would encourage them to be open to take care of me when the time comes. But we are all built differently and one can only hope for the best.”
Jazmin D Zuñiga: “I told my kids to take me to a nursing home, I hope I can drive myself there!! I’ll teach zumba in a wheelchair. I will not put my kids through a situation where they unwillingly make me feel not wanted. I’m built differently, I guess. I believe as adults we should try to take good care of our health to live a longer healthier life and if we don’t or can’t take care of ourselves due to that, that’s not our childrens fault. Nah, I’ll take the nursing home!! Use my $$$ for someone to help me wipe my toosh. I hope it’s a young, strong, handsome man!”
Reyes Alicia: “I won’t ever place that responsibility on them because I owe my kids everything. I brought them into the world. Raising them well and providing for them is part of that responsibility. If they want to take care of me, great, but I don’t think I want to place that burden on them. I’d rather save for a solid retirement so we can pay to live in a senior community where my kids can come visit us when they want.”
Louis Escareno: “It’s my responsibility to set up my own care should I reach that age.”
Norma Sanchez Martinez: “I don’t think my children should look after me, but I’d hope they would. I helped my grandma take care of my grandpa. I just think it’s the right thing to do.”
Mikey Barrera: “That is sad. What if you were given a glimpse of your future and you would see yourself like that? Would life still have the same meaning to you ,knowing what the future holds? Would you work as hard or try as hard or just give up? I used to do karaoke for old people. Man, they would come out of their chairs when or if they could. Bottom line, live life now.”
Larry Don: “Just wheel me to the nearest Casino, I’m good.”
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Jeff Hull: “That’s been going on for a very long time. 20 years ago I worked at a retirement community where there was an assisted living building. The biggest issue for the residents was that their families put them there and just left them there. Many had no visit from family members. Where I live now and as their Resident Council President I saw and continue to see the same exact thing. Unfortunately many pass away in their apartments alone. Sometimes they aren’t found for weeks. It’s sad.”
Feliz Flores: “I would rather find a man to take care of me or go to a place for old people, kids nowadays don’t have patience and I wouldn’t put them through that either.”
Rick Carter: “The Aging at Home Association plan can become like a Home Care Savings account for the family to manage so their parents and loved ones can receive skilled care at home….”
Sonja Grom : “I do not expect any help. I must take care of my children and not the opposite. It is NOT their duty to help me. I hope I die before getting dependent on somebody. I want dignity, children must have their life and freedom! Children are not slaves to their parents, they do not owe anything to their parents.”
Jesse: “I am 80+ with cancer, and have lived alone all my life. Now I have to think ahead, buy groceries in cans when I feel good enough to shop, clean the house little at a time. I do washing every few days, and hope that someday I will be able to buy a pill that I can take when I am ready to die, that will kill me quickly, and painlessly. Everyone should have the ability to take a pill whenever they have come to the end of the line.”
Win Marsh: “My aunt never married and never had children. As she grew older, she placed her name on the waiting list of a Senior Housing Center. It took 5 years, but eventually an apartment opened up there. She sold her home and moved into the independent living side of the facility. As she aged and needed more help, she moved into their full care unit. She had purchased Long Term Care Coverage that paid first for the added costs of the Full Care Unit. Both of us nieces remained very involved in her life long after her siblings had passed away. When she died, at age 95, she had family, friends and a church congregation all mourning her death. She was fiercely independent yet very socially connected.”
Old Biddy: “My children have their own lives which I have no desire to disrupt. I don’t think it’s right to place that kind of burden on them when their lives are already filled with responsibilities. So, about 15 years ago, I bought a long-term care insurance policy to help pay for professional care should I need it. I believe my care is my responsibility. Should I not need it, the money goes to my beneficiaries. My attorney told me it’s the smartest thing I could’ve done.”
Nikki Marie : “Children should help their aging parents. That’s what family is for. We are here to support each other. The only reason why I would not take care of my parents when they are elderly is if their care far exceeds what I am able to do. Then it’s time to think about other options. I would still visit them often if they were in a skilled care facility! Otherwise, we will make something work out. This life isn’t all about me. It’s also about family and others. I don’t think I could live with myself if I knew my mom and dad were struggling while I’m out living my life somewhere. That’s not fair. I can still live life and help them however I can. That’s the way it should be. My mom and dad set me up for success and took care of me for years. Why wouldn’t I want to extend that same courtesy to them?”
