Is using your children as a pawn child abuse? No matter what happened between you and the other parent, whether they cheated, mishandled finances, or just weren’t good partners, the children had nothing to do with it. Do you think preventing your child from spending time with the other parent or talking negatively about them in front of the child is child abuse? Let’s talk about it…
Kareem Ali: “ I went through this for years, even went to court and she turned the kids against me, even with the child support and visitation. I wish this on no man but hey it made me stronger and one of my three kids stays in line with me and is married. One out of three! It’s sad and they’re grown and she’s still mad because she ain’t got nobody. You are gonna get a lot of them saying they’ll never do it. They are the main ones that do it from my experience.”
Glenda McBride Brown: “Our children are supposed to be loved, at all times, and regardless of what we as parents go through, the children should never be privy to it. Especially hate, disputes , or anything derogatory. We are supposed to set standards for our children, be role models, and teach them about life, but to never involve them in any of our misbehavior, or criticism. After all, they didn’t ask to come here, but we must respect, and love them at all times, and make them feel happy, respected, loved, and blessed that they are here.”
Thelma Wright: “I totally agree! My mom told me, and I listened, not to speak evil against my child’s father because they will grow up and learn for themselves.”
LaTonia Brooks Harris: “If adults just grow up and learn to be emotionally mature this wouldn’t happen.”
Ann Riedl: “Yes it is. So called grown women/men using the kids to get what they want or to hurt the other parent.”
Victoria Rivers: “Or speak against the grandparents.”
Millie Rivas: “It’s not about the parents, it’s about the kids!”
Angela Marie: “I have worked in Child Welfare for over 25 years and this is way too common! It is absolutely abuse and it has a very negative effect on children! Children will not be hurt by too much love, but they are hurt when there is not enough. At one point, there was something you liked in the person you now have so much animosity towards, remember what it was you liked for the sake of your children!”
Acelia Torres Morales: “I supervise court ordered visitation and this happens all the time. Parents even tell the kids what to say to other parents when they see them. It’s awful and it hurts me to see these kids being put in the middle. Also parents talk about the other parent in front of the kids during their visit. I’ve had to stop several conversations. I’m glad that I’m there to help and protect these kids!”
Monique Jackson: “Totally agree. Children need both parents involved in their upbringing. Now if one parent is detrimental to their child’s development & wellbeing, then it’s a no; but the custodial parent should not speak negatively about the other parent.”
Sheila Harmsworth: “It is an absolute disgrace. I know people who, to this day, still use their child as a carrot. It’s disgusting. And I have spoken out about it.”
Claudia Melton: “We’re products of our environment; mentally/emotionally spews into us as we’re developing through those formative years. As we age, we as children will act out in rebellious, self-destructive, negativity behaviors that alter our mindsets in developing relationships, specifically from teen years into adulthood. This subject matter is a reflection of our emotions; whereas, we forgive or continue on with malice but doing an injustice to the child/children.”
Eternally Malaika: “I detest playing games with children. If the safety of the child is at risk, that’s one thing. That includes mental safety. However, don’t arbitrarily make those decisions if there’s no obvious safety concern. Document the instances of concern and allow the court to decide.”
Alex Andra: “Yes, put the courts condone it, they condone narcissistic behavior. What do you do then? If you go rogue then they want to use the “law” against you in the effort to protect the children. It’s insane.”
Randi Hall Phillips: “I am an aunt that does not play about my nieces and nephews!!! And anybody can get checked about bad behavior around them. My sisters, their ex husbands/boyfriends… ANYBODY! The babies are innocents and deserve present, respectful parents.”
Nivea Nadae Rahming: “My husband went through this and let me tell you we have a very angry distorted young woman on our hands. Her mother kept her from him and told extreme lies that included me when I wasn’t even in the picture for their relationship. It’s sad really because no matter what he did to combat it she is so indoctrinated by mother they have no relationship.”
Becky Sayre: “That is something my mom never did was talk bad about my dad even though she would have been justified.”
Monique Jackson: “Totally agree. Children need both parents involved in their upbringing. Now if one parent is detrimental to their child’s development & wellbeing, then it’s a no; but the custodial parent should not speak negatively about the other parent.”
Victor Doria: “Children have become luggage in the last 30 yrs either you have a one piece two piece or 3-5 piece set of luggage. They have become an inconvenience rather than an enjoyment, not for all parents but so many!”
Marilyn Pulley Howard: “Also it is wrong to keep kids from seeing their grandparents.”
