Mother’s Day; the day to celebrate the wonderful women (or not so wonderful) who gave us life. I dread this time of year. Everywhere I go it is like there is a giant sign reminding me that my mom died and that she is no longer alive and a reminder that I will have to live today, every day and all the rest of my Mother’s Day’s without her. It brings my grief to my thoughts even when I was just fine. It brings out emotions I have been able to cope with. It forces me to grieve and feel, all over again. I know her spirit is here with me and most of the time, that’s enough; it has to be. But some days… Just one more day, 5 more minutes, one more conversation. My beautiful family.. blood and not blood, always gives me the most beautiful thoughts, prayers, gifts, texts. I am so grateful for. She died in 1995. It has never gotten easier. Is there a right way to feel? A right way to act that day? a right thing to say to someone as complicated as me? Let’s talk about it.. And if you are blessed enough to still have your mamas; no matter how crazy, stubborn, difficult, or obnoxious, love her and tell her. Treat her like every day could be her last. Death came like a thief in the night. She was coming home the next day. Tomorrow never came but she knew how much we loved her. When she went, a part of me went with her. but one day, we will be together. To all you crazy mamas out there.. lots of love, hugs, and positive vibes. Our job is not an easy one. Let’s talk about it…

Mary Svetlik Watkins:
“I’m on the memory of my mom’s final days as we approach the Anniversary of her death. It is being a mother without a mom to celebrate with. We didn’t know the last we spent together was the last. I wonder if we knew we’d have done more. Her last Mother’s Day was spent in a vegetative state in the ICU. We couldn’t bring flowers or give her cards. My first thought when we moved her to hospice was now we could have flowers.”

Donna K Browning Benson:
“Beautiful, feel the same way.”

Sandy Rodriguez:
“I am blessed to still have my mom and even though we don’t see eye to eye on anything I appreciate every day I have her she’ll be 80 in September.”

Esteef Voldese:
“What a Beautiful post. I’ve been having an emotional reckoning with my mom, whose faults have been hinging on narcissism. You point it out toward the end of the post. Yet, how could anyone not love a mom like mine? It’s just she can be a bit much (and so goes with me). Recently I’ve thought of moving far away from my narrow-minded family. Then I imagine being somewhere all by myself and I don’t feel peace. “Tremenda” describes my mom to a tee. She’s tough, bold, wise and amazingly talented, yet her kids can longer stand each other. So it’s love when it’s good but then resentment when it’s all the times I could have used my moms love and she was cold, unsympathetic and resented me because I am a man. The truth is complex…”

Yvette Tello to
Esteef Voldese:
“I believe you and I’m so sorry but I hope you can see her ways have made you the strong wonderful resilient person you are. Love her for you, not for her. but be grateful that you have that crazy dramatic family you have. They are part of us. Lots of love to you and your difficult Tremenda mama. She’s the only one you got. God will bless you for it.”

Nanette Jambers:
“I feel you. My ma’ has been gone for 20 years now. And I still walk around feeling lost on Mother’s day.”